naming God (as an accomplice)

Anyone who knows me knows that I have a problem with religion. It's not that I don't believe in God or that I hate all religious stuff. I just don't like the way most religious groups preach one thing and do another. Like tolerance. Saying "love thy neighbor" doesn't mean a whole lot when you are bad mouthing the neighbor because they aren't "real" christians.
Part of my problem is that I just have no appreciation for fanaticism. Whether it's of the tight-lipped, judgemental kind or the wild-haired, eye-rolling martyr type, I pretty much lose interest about the point some yahoo tells me they heard it straight from God's mouth. Somehow I have a hard time believing God is all that interested in talking to some freeze-dried whackaloon.
Reading the news this morning, I ran across this article. Basically, this little 11 year old girl in Wisconsin died because her parents believed it was better to pray over her than take her to a doctor. She had a treatable form of diabetes, which apparently went undiagnosed. Even though she had been showing signs of serious illness for over a month according to family and friends, her parents thought they should just hold fast in their faith and everything would be okay. I read the article and even watched the video. During the video, pieces of two 911 calls are played. The one from the aunt was awful. The aunt seemed sure the mother would fight EMS over taking the daughter to the hospital. Then I read this article, which was an interview with some so-called man of God about his interaction with the family. He had apparently spoken to the parents as they rode behind the ambulance transporting their comatose daughter. I'll just paste the bit that pissed me off:

In the call Sunday, "they told me that she had stopped breathing and asked if I would pray that The Lord would spare her and raise her up, which I did," he wrote. "I called on our prayer ministers and elders to pray for her too. "The next thing I heard from them was that they were being investigated,which is sad since they don't investigate the people who put their trust in doctors whose family members die by the hundreds of thousands from medical mistakes every year, according the AMA's own admission. "We know that the doctors do the best they can with what they have and we do not condemn them. We would like the same consideration."

Umm, excuse me?? This moron is comparing his mouthing of pleas and platitudes with the work of a doctor who knows how to treat the disease the girl had. How on earth these dummies think their prayers are on the same level as actual treatment just floors me. Sorry, prayers and faith are great but THEY ARE NOT AN ACCEPTABLE SUBSTITUTE FOR REAL MEDICAL INTERVENTION! Pray all you want while the doctors are giving your kid medicine. Just don't leave out the part where you take the kid to the doctor. As far as I'm concerned the parents are guilty of criminal negligence, that freak preacher is guilty of encouraging (or demanding, depending on his preaching) same and now the adults who should have been taking care of this kid are trying to blame God. That's right, I said blame. None of them are taking responsibility. None of them are saying "Yes, I decided not to take Madeline to the doctor when she got sick. I decided she didn't need medicine, just prayer. I denied Madeline medical care and she died because I decided to pray instead of use my God-given common sense." Not one of these adults has stepped forward and admitted their decisions were this little girl's primary cause of death. Nope, instead they are all saying "We prayed for her" "We did the best we could do" "We stayed fast in prayer" "Our lives are in God's hands" . So, in other words, they are saying it isn't their fault this little girl died from a treatable condition (diabetes), she died because God wanted her to. Somehow, I have a problem believing that. God gave us brains and brains are for thinking, not filling up the space inside your skull to keep down the echoes. As far as the last sentence in the preacher's statement, about receiving the same consideration as doctors, I call BULLSHIT! He doesn't deserve any consideration, he deserves at the least a foot in the ass. He and the parents did not do the best they could, they didn't do anything (the parents weren't even the ones who called 911). Why should they receive any consideration, why does he think that his efforts were on par with what a doctor could have done? A doctor could have actually treated Madeline for diabetes. Instead, Madeline dies at the ripe old age of 11 and her parents and preacher pat themselves on the back for keeping the faith. That's not a miscarriage of justice, that's an abortion of truth. How much you wanna bet her parents are pro-lifers committed to saving unborn children? Too bad Madeline was already past the fetal stage.

Recipe for that dessert

If ya want it, here it is:
4 Layer Dessert

1st layer
1 c. self rising flour
1 stick of real butter
1 c. chopped pecans

mix and press into ungreased, clear glass pan (9x13) bake at 325 degrees 10 - 15 minutes. Wait until completely cooled before starting next (if you are in a hurry stick it in the fridge)

2nd Layer
1 c. Cool Whip
1 c. powdered sugar
1 8oz. block of Philadelphia Cream Cheese (I use 2 cuz I love cream cheese. It's good either way)

mix and spread over crust. chill until set.

3rd Layer
1 large pkg of Instant Chocolate pudding
3 c. milk
4 - 6 tsps. of sugar

mix and spread over cream cheese layer. chill until set.

4th layer

Cover with Cool Whip and sprinkle with chopped pecans.

See? Dead easy! And so very good. The only thing I can tell you is don't skimp on the ingredients. Use real butter. Do not use sugar-free or low-fat stuff. Seriously, it's just not as good. Besides, if you're gonna sin you might as well make it worthwhile.

Happy Easter

telling myself to STFU

I went by the gym tonight and spent some time sweating. On the way home, I stopped by the bank to deposit my paycheck. It's a small bank in a small town so depositing my check means signing it and dropping it in the night box. And that's exactly what I did. Three-fourths of the way home (which isn't all that far) I suddenly heard That Voice. You know the one, it pipes up in the back of your head to tell you that you've screwed up somehow. Mine was telling me that I hadn't dropped my signed paycheck into the slot, that I had somehow dropped the envelope on the ground and left it there for someone to find. And someone would find it and throw it away or take it and cash it or something else awful. And there I'd be, minus a whole paycheck. Man, That Voice was coming up with all sorts of terrible stuff. Missed bills, late payments, so forth and so on. All of that, despite the fact that I knew I'd dropped that check into that slot. I saw it disappear. But because of That Voice, I kept wanting to turn around and go back to make sure. Even sitting here typing this, hours later, I still feel the urge to throw on some jeans and go check the bank parking lot, just to make sure. I haven't done it yet and I keep telling That Voice to shut up. Reminding myself that I saw the envelope drop into the slot. That Voice replies that maybe that's an old memory, from another night. I tell That Voice to hush up one more time.
I guess a lot of people have a Voice like that. Some people's Voices sound like somebody else. I've heard of folks hearing their mama or grandpa. I wouldn't mind hearing someone else's Voice. It's a lot easier to ignore somebody else. I hear my own voice. Let me tell you something, it can be very hard to ignore your own self talking at you, fussing and worrying, criticizing and complaining. And, man, I am mean. That Voice can bring up stuff that happened years ago, making me feel stupid all over again. So I try to tell myself to shut the fuck up. Too bad I'm so hard-headed, I don't even mind my own self. So, I'm trying to write all this out, hoping I don't sound like I'm flat crazy, thinking that maybe putting it all down like this will show That Voice that yeah, it got to me. I just won't give in to it. And I wonder, if That Voice is me, why do I get so mad? Why don't I like it?

imagine me rolling my eyes

I've been a bit scatter-brained lately, more so than usual. I don't know whether it's the time of year, everything that's been going on, or what, but I can't seem to get things done here lately. Not enough time, not enough energy. I have managed to read quite a few books, but then again, I can always find time and energy for books.
I haven't posted anything in a while (obviously!) but something happened today I just had to share. I get a lot of phone calls at the bookstore from people who want to know if we have a particular title in stock. Usually the caller asks what the store hours are during the same phone call. Usually calls like that take about 5 minutes. Today I had one that didn't go quite as usual. The caller definitely made my list.

Me: Book Nook, may I help you?
Her: Yeah, do y'all have a book called Killing Mockingbirds? Or whatever it is, I don't know.
Me: To Kill a Mockingbird, by Harper Lee? (You wouldn't believe the variations I hear on that title, but I was pretty sure that was it)
Her: Yeah, I guess, whatever.
Me: Yes ma'am I have several copies
Her: Ok, what are y'all's hours? What time do you close and
what days are you open?
Me: 9:30 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Saturday
Her: Are y'all open on Sunday?
Me: No
Her: Ok, so y'all are open right now, today until 6
Me: Yes

And then she hung up. So I went to help a customer and while I was talking to that customer the phone rang again. It had only been about 6 or 7 minutes since that phone call.

Me: Book Nook, may I help you?
Her: Uh, yeah I just called about that book How to Kill with
Mockingbirds and you said you had one.
Me: Yes ma'am
Her: Are you still open, you said you were open till 6
Me: Yes, we're open until 6 today. (It was about 5:20)
Her: Well you're open till 6. Is someone gonna be there?
Me: Ma'am?
Her: I'm sending my kid to get a copy, and I just wanted to make sure somebody was gonna be there in a few minutes since y'all are open until 6
Me: Yes ma'am I will be here until 6
Her: Ok so you'll be there? I mean I don't want to send him if you aren't there when he gets there.
Me: We close at 6, I'll be here until 6. At 6, I'm locking up and leaving. So as long as he gets here before 6, I'll be here.
Her: Ok I just wanted to make sure someone would be there until 6

I had to laugh after I hung up. I really, really wanted to tell her that even though the store was open until 6, no one would be there. She could just come in and get her book. And make sure to leave her money on the counter. The customer who was in the store overheard my side of the conversation and by the time I got off the phone she was laughing her ass off. The best part? When the kid came in to pick up the book, I recognized him. His mom (the one who called) is the stepdaughter (from a previous marriage) of the woman my dad is now married to. I'm just thankful there's no actual blood relation.