Desires and dreams

Dreaming

Days,

craving your touch

Nights,

burning in your arms

Dreaming

of your embrace

Dawn wakes me

and you vanish like

a mist, leaving only

a haunting melody

a whispering sigh

to remember you

And I lie here alone

praying for night

Wondering if my dream lover

will find me again.

Distraction found

OK, HERE ARE YOUR WORDS OF ADVICE FOR TODAY...
Never,
Ever,
Ever
~EVER~
Under ANY Circumstance

Kiss A Monkey!!

Thanks Mz_Pitbull, I really needed that! (I always wanted a self-fellating monkey!)

I'm whining

I am, to be honest, unbearable when I don't feel well. Depending on how rough I feel, my attitude ranges from whiny all the way to homicidal. So don't bother reading any further unless whiny doesn't bother you much. Because today, I was pitifully whiny.
Here's why:
See the area marked "Maxillary"? Normally, that would be open, as in sinus cavity. Unless, of course, you've had so many sinus infections that it is scarred almost completely shut. Like me. Allergies and sinus problems are pretty common on both sides of my family. What that means for me is year-round misery, punctuated by episodes of severe pain and lots of doctor visits. I usually end up with a severe respiratory infection at least twice a year. Guess what time of year it is?
I woke up about 2 a.m. today with my head pounding so hard I had to doze sitting up. Yes, I took something. As a matter of fact, I took lots of something. The only thing the medicine helped me do was sleep through all my alarms so I was late for work. At this point, the pain has subsided a bit. Now it just feels like someone punched me in the eye, beat the inside of my head with a baseball bat and finished up by scrubbing the area behind my cheek and eye with steel wool. Believe me, that is an improvement. So, I will be calling my doctor to make an appointment, even though she and I both know exactly what's wrong, and I know word-for-word what she will tell me. Just as long as she writes a prescription, I am willing to listen to the lecture.
For the moment, however, I am going to go spend another 40 minutes under a hot shower, steaming my head open. And then find something to distract me until it's time for more pills.

Bad choices - but at least they provide amusement to others

I always wondered why people vandalize property. Especially when the vandal does something like spray painting their full name across the back of the police station. Somebody got dropped on his head too many times as a child. This one was a little different. If the police ever catch this guy, the attempts to identify him and prove his guilt are sure to be entertaining.
The second story is about yet another man caught in a public display of affection. His chosen love interest, however, was a mannequin. Personally, I think this one is the fault of the security guard, who should have respected a closed door.
The Smoking Gun has some of the most entertaining mug shots I've ever seen. Speaking of poor decision making skills, these folks' problems apparently started well before their arrests.

This last one sounded like a great idea. Anyone who has had to endure some of the spelling and grammar atrocities so prevalent today will probably cheer these guys on every step.

So I admit it, I'm a nerd

I really do like these tests. They make me laugh and give me something to do when I should be doing something productive.
I found this one on ...so I stabbed him in the head with a fork, a blog I truly enjoy. I found Fauve in Lola's blogroll on sweetened*taters. Also a good place to visit, Lola is very funny and smart.
Back to the test. The first time I took it, I scored a 57. The second time I was at home and not being interrupted and scored a 65. When I told T about it, he started laughing. He says I shouldn't need a test, since it's written all over me. Nice, huh?

I'm not the only one who likes these

Boss Lady has decided to carry a small selection of T-shirts at the bookstore. I thought it was a great idea when I saw the catalog. There was enough variety to have something for everyone. I saw multiple designs for every animal imaginable plus Native American, butterfly, funny and fantasy designs. So what does she get? Ten different tiger designs. I know they'll do well, this is LSU country, but I was hoping for more. She also ordered (in children's sizes only) puppies, kittens, seals, penguins and pink horses. Yeah, pink horses. So we now have 15 different designs and none of them are all that interesting.

She did offer to add any I wanted for myself to her order. So I ended up with a couple new ones:I wore the fairy one the other day, and every one I met asked where I got that shirt. When I said I got it through work, the next question was did the store have any more like it. So, I guess the next time Boss Lady makes it to the store, I'll let her know that there are quite a few people around here who would like fantasy or Celtic themed T-shirts. Maybe she will change her mind. Maybe.

I like these little tests

I was wandering around a little while ago and ran across a link on someone's blog. You click the link and get your personality analyzed according to how you draw a picture. I get a kick out of those things, so I clicked. I found it a little difficult to draw using my mouse, but since I'm not the least bit talented at drawing stuff, no big deal there. Anyway, this is the result of my analysis:

You tend to pursue many different activities simultaneously. When misfortune does happen, it doesn't actually dishearten you all that much.You are a thoughtful and cautious person. You like to think about your method, seeking to pursue your goal in the most effective way.You are creative, mentally active and industrious.You are ambitious and optimistic, determined to prove and advertise yourself.

Well, the first line is definitely true. The rest of it, I don't know. As for my drawing, if you look to the right it is just under the butterfly. Don't laugh too hard!

Little things

Ever notice, when you're having a bad day, sometimes the smallest things can change your whole outlook? A smile from a stranger, the light turning green as you reach the intersection, hearing a little kid giggling, your dog meeting you at the door or just standing in a patch of sunlight on a cloudy day.
I've finally learned to pay attention to the little things. Appreciating life's small joys has made dealing with the larger disappointments so much easier. It's amazing how much difference a call from a friend or a hug from one of the kids can make. Often, they don't even realize how much their actions affect me. So now I wonder, how many small things do I do in a day that make someone else feel better?
Enough, I hope.

I feel like I'm working in daycare

The highlight of my day (so far) was overhearing this conversation at the store:

#1: Quit shoving me!

#2: Well, you shoved me first!

#1: No I didn't, I was trying to catch you before you
fell!

#2: I wouldn't lose my balance if you weren't climbing
all over the top of me!

#1: I did not!

#2: You did!

It went downhill from there. The two participants were 70+ year old women. Who came in together. And looked so much alike they had to be related.

The other eye roll was for the lady who said "These were on the 2/$1 rack but I don't know if they are 50 cents each."

Good god people, WHY must you lick your fingers to count money? Do you really think I want to touch something you've spit on? Damn, that is just gross. And then you stop halfway through and lick your fingers again. I guess you have no idea how many disgusting little critters are all over that crumpled, stained 10 year old dollar bill.

I'm nominating all three for the list.

I swear I'm gonna puke on the next person who says "The customer is always right!" to me. No, you aren't right. L'Amour did not write Streets of Laredo, and we don't have to order anything you want. Some people walk in here with the worst attitudes. I try to be polite, but when you start cursing at me I'm going to turn around and walk away. Keep it up and you'll be removed from the premises. And I'll smile and wave bye-bye when the nice policeman takes you away!

Yeesh, some days it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.

More real news

Pure laziness is what it is. So I'm doing news stories again, which of course I got from somewhere else. It was this or random thoughts and my randoms weren't very nice today. Which means a rant about work is coming real soon. Anyway, here's my version of important stuff people should know:

• Stop Alien Abductions! This has to be one of the funnier sites I've run across. I absolutely love the detailed instructions, complete with a list of needed skills. Also, as you can see, the writer included tool and material lists. I would try to make one of these, but anyone who has seen me with scissors knows how bad an idea that would be. I am going to try to find out more about this guy.
• Chocolate and the environment - Now this is something I consider important. I like chocolate, a lot. Which explains why I weigh more than I want. Get into a smaller size or have another Ghirardelli dark chocolate & mint square? Real easy choice for me. Hey, I'm helping the environment! I think I'll have two pieces.
• Multiple orgasms carried to the extreme - Thanks to GVI who posted a link to this story. I don't know whether I am sympathetic or jealous. I do know that I'd change career paths if I were this lady.

So now you know. I'm lazy and frivolous. Could be worse. I could be mean, arrogant, self-righteous and condescending. But that would take more energy than I am willing to expend.

This is the closest I get to real news

Remember when I said I am rarely serious? I was telling the gods' honest truth. The links in this post are about as close as I get to real news. My fellow d-hallers hopefully will appreciate the humor.

• I really think Lola and Wade should enter this contest. I wonder if the judges allow assless chaps. At least boxers are on the approved apparel list!
• This is for everyone who finds Google ads amusing. It's not about the ads themselves, but I did wonder what would happen if the glitch moved from matching photos with stories to matching ads to websites. I can only imagine stripper pole ads appearing on a conservative religious site. And Mishee, the word algorithms only appears once, but it's plural so does it count as more than one instance?
• After a discussion about coffee earlier today, I ran across a story about coffee condoms. I wonder if they come in New Orleans Blend Dark Roast?
• Criminals with sex toys? Not sure I want more details about why the appliance was tethered to the guy.
• Now this is what I call ironic. If you are such an asshole that even other assholes condemn you, maybe you should just stay home.

Okay, I'm done for the night. I have a really great book waiting for me. I'd like to at least start Laurell Hamilton's A Lick of Frost before bedtime. Or maybe not.