Another bright move

Once upon a time, back when I worked for Dr Lisa, our regular UPS guy was an older man who liked to pick on me and he ended up giving me my most used nickname. I wore a particular brand of scrubs. The company that makes this brand sews a small tag on the right pocket of all of their shirts. Jimmy (the UPS guy) decides since that name appears on all my shirts it must be my nickname. And then he dared me to sign for packages using that name. And every time I call UPS the customer service rep gets the giggles.
Now 4 years later it's become a habit to use my nickname when signing for deliveries especially since my real last names are hard to spell. And it wouldn't be a problem except for the fact that I am a little distracted most days.
Not too long ago, one of the city employees came by the store to do a fire and safety inspection. Everything went fine until the end. Mr. Fireman hands me the form and tells me to sign the bottom. So I did, nice and pretty. Once again, did not even realize what I'd done until the guy looks at me, grins and says "Is this your legal name?" Yep, I signed my nickname. I kinda laughed and told him no, it was a nickname and signed my real name under my nickname.
Somewhere in the bowels of City Hall, there is an official gummint document signed "Peaches".

Well, it amuses me anyway

I would like to know where, in the Big Book o' Universal Laws, it says "M-A should spend an inordinate amount of time on her knees while at work." Cuz I'm gonna take a razor and slice that page out. I work at a book store, ferfuckssake. You'd think that would be a nice, quiet little job. And it probably would be except it's me, the person who can manage to do something silly or embarassing in the least likely circumstances.
The other day a customer came in looking for some old, out of print books. I'm blaming him for the entire thing, because really, what kind of grown man wants Lone Ranger books? (Joking there, I've been asked for stranger from stranger) So I tell him where to find them, he can't find them, I go back there to find them. If we had any, they'd have been on the bottom shelf on the sci-fi aisle (don't ask me why, that's just where we put them). Which is where me on my knees comes in. So there I is, on my knees, ankles crossed, checking the shelves. Didn't see any, but we've got stuff stacked on the floor a little further down the aisle. Instead of getting up and moving like anybody with common sense would do, I sat back on my heels, twisted my upper body around and leeeaaannneeedd over to look. Not at all a professional pose, unless you're a human pretzel. I turned my head to tell the guy I didn't see any and he is looking at me like I am outside my mind. And apparently I am, because I only then realized exactly what I looked like to the guy standing over me.

At least I managed to untwist and stand up gracefully. In heels, at that.

Fun and not so fun

We went to the trade show in New Orleans this past Saturday. By we, I mean NewBossLady, MsPitbull and me. In NOLA. On a Saturday. At the Convention Center. Fucking yay. Wasn't too bad, traffic was crazy, but since I drove we made it in about 80 minutes. Yes I have a lead foot and a piss poor attitude behind the wheel. No I'm not a defensive driver. I prefer to think of myself as an offensive driver. And by offensive, I surely do mean shouting "You stupid fucking moron, park that piece of shit SUV and walk!" out of an open window. So that part was amusing, at least for me.
We get there and I discover the true meaning of hell. I have never seen so many women in one place at the same time in my life. It wasn't clouds of estrogen, it was a goddam smog, a sea of surging hormones. And Diet Coke.
It was fun though, once I got past all that. NBL and Pit are a blast to hang out with, we looked at some great stuff. This trade show had lots n lots n lots of jewelry. Lots. Of. Sparkly. Things. Also, cooking stuff, cleaning stuff, clothes (OMG I actually had to stop and look, some of the stuff was great. And I bought a shirt. The other two tried to talk me into a belly dancer's outfit but I had to draw the line somewhere), luggage, knickyknacks, you name it somebody was selling it. We bought a bunch of stuff for the store, took business cards to make appointments with vendors, looked at everything, touched most things and did a good bit of personal shopping.
Lessee, I bought jewelry for me, jewelry for T, clothing for me and the nieces and best of all knives. Umm, I bought 5 knives. 1 big ass blade as long as my forearm and 4 smaller ones. My favorite kind of sparkly stuff.

Today a jewelry guy came by the store to see NBL. Pit and I helped select some jewelry for the store and bought ourselves some sparklies of our very own. Nice to get stuff at cost and be able to help pick stuff out. Between the 3 of us we have a pretty wide range of tastes so lots of different kinds of things to play with now. I really liked this necklace, chunky pieces of smoky quartz. A little to big to suit me but I loved it.

We have been crazy busy but it's all been pretty fun. I like working in such a light hearted atmosphere. Other than the former crazy owner/boss lady (who has been renamed Satan's Psycho Cow) coming around everything has been great. The other ongoing problem is our main distributor for books. Their order site has been down since Saturday morning. So we are unable to look up or order books and our order has been delayed. yippee fun joy for me.
We are dealing with it but it does add a touch of aggravation to the day.

Anyway, I'm doing ok. I'm loving work, T came home this morning to spend Thanksgiving, I talked to both brothers and both parents in the last few days and everything is going well.

Oh, the not so fun? That was this evening. Turning into a total klutz. Tripping and falling down my stairs. Busting my knee and my face. The knee can be hidden under jeans but I think it's gonna be pretty hard to hide the humongous fat lip I've got. And the bruised chin. *sigh* Oh well, at least I didn't break my glasses.

Happy Thanksgiving to all my favorite Troublemakers! Hope y'all have a wonderful Thursday.

P.S. Pit brought me a can of coffee beans - the brand is Kicking Horse and it's the KickAss dark - anybody tried this stuff before? It smells good, I haven't tried it yet. Gotta love a friend who knows your weaknesses.