Speeding at me like a derailed bullet train. (Do bullet trains derail? And if they do, do they keep going so fast? Eh, who cares, I like it so I'm using it.)
Anyways, I've been a bit Scroogey this year. Well, a lot Scroogey actually, but I'm working on it. Now if I can just figure out a way to make everyone cooperate...
Hello, is this the Acme Corporation? Yes, I'm interested in mind-control gadgets? You have them? Great! How powerful? Weeelll...
Oh. Nobody makes one powerful enough to handle last-minute shoppers and neurotic relatives?
Sigh. Now I'll have to think up something else for Santa to bring me.
At least I can listen to my all time favorite Christmas song without getting weird looks. People really do think you're strange if you sing carols in July. Especially this one:
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Merry Christmas, hon! I hope you have a good not too neurotic one, and I think a derailed bullet train would keep going :)
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